Enterprise columnist
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And now, the epilogue to my two months of homelessness and $60,000 in damage caused by one cheap plastic toilet fitting. And you\’re thinking, OK, I\’m really getting tired of this topic. And you just shut up, because at least you didn\’t have to live it. If I suffer, you suffer, too.
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Let\’s tie up the loose ends: Yes, I\’m back home, yes, all my stuff came back in one piece, yes, the kitties survived, yes, everything was repaired or replaced, yes, it is as good as new, probably better and, most of all, hay-ull no it wasn\’t worth it. I\’d gladly give up every lovely new carpet, countertop and freshly painted wall to rewind the last two months and have every dusty, tattered thing right back the way it was. The stress of this whole experience surely shaved a year or two off my lifespan.
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Thankfully, my homeowner\’s insurance, AAA, paid for all the damage. Two thumbs way up for AAA, and its claims adjuster Vickie Adams, known only to me as a voice on a telephone, but I envision her with silky gossamer wings and a floating golden halo. This woman kept me from unraveling, and bear in mind, I\’m not all that raveled to begin with.
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Case in point: One day, about $30,000 into this ordeal, I got a very stern-looking letter from AAA with photos of the broken plastic toilet fitting, an engineer\’s analysis of what happened, and a conclusion that a manufacturer defect was the cause of the flood. And, incidentally, AAA doesn\’t cover manufacturer\’s defects and will not pay for them, goodbye, good luck and God bless.
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It only took about three pounding heartbeats before the hyperventilation kicked in. It appeared that AAA had found a legal loophole, and was ditching me midstream: sorry, Lady, sucks to be you. “Panic” doesn\’t adequately capture my reaction. You know how people say their life flashes before them in an accident? My financial life flashed before me — Catastrophic debt! Collection agents! Mountains of bills! Foreclosure! Divorce! Ending up, as the late, great Chris Farley would say, Living in a van down by Putah Creek!
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I left a frantic message for Vickie, and the half-hour it took for her to call me back was a psychological hurricane of despair and doom, my thoughts ping-ponging around my skull in frantic little snippets. If anything was ever going to trigger my first heart attack, that would have been it: a half-finished, uninhabitable house worth essentially nothing in its current state, $30K in sudden debt, plus a suddenly upside-down $65,000 mortgage, and another $30K due to the renovation contractors. I was finished, financially. It was all over.
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Thankfully, Vickie called me before the first wave of angina bolted through me and managed to talk me down. I\’d misunderstood the letter. AAA wasn\’t refusing to cover the damage. They were refusing to cover the one damaged part. Which costs about $5. I took in the words and was able to calm my thoughts, but my entire system was saturated with adrenalin. This is what “nervous wreck” means. It feels like a train wreck in your head.
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I chalked up the rest of the day as a loss, paid an emergency visit to my massage therapist and capped it off with a hot bath and a glass of wine. My husbie returned from San Jose, took one look at me and asked if he should take me to the hospital. No, I said, just keep my wine glass full and don\’t expect coherency until tomorrow. And wrap your arms around me and don\’t let go until I say so. That\’s the best way to re-ravel.
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In the entire story, here\’s the most interesting footnote: I got a call on Friday from an attorney who is pursuing damages against Robert Manufacturing Co., the company that makes those toilet fittings like the one that failed in my house. I hope he bends this company over a barrel. I want him to make them squeal. And Lordy, Lordy, do they have it coming. An agent from AAA told me that the type of damage I had in my house is suddenly becoming common. Apparently these fittings have about a 10-year lifespan. My house was about 11 years old when my fitting failed.
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You can read about these types of fittings online: http://www.subrogationrecoverylawblog.com/tags/toilet/ and I can\’t stress enough the importance of looking at your own toilet fittings today to see if you have them. If so, replace them today.
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Trust me, you do not want to go through what I just went through, particularly for a stupid $5 piece of plastic. Truly, it makes me furious to think of all the people out there who are going through the same thing because of a simple, easily replaced plastic fitting. It\’s incomprehensible.
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Mr. Attorney Man, show no mercy. And if this company is still selling these things, knowing that they\’re faulty, they should go straight to jail. Right after they compensate every single person whose home was destroyed.
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Wait.
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I best not go too far down that trail or that adrenaline will kick in, and angry adrenaline is a little trickier to disperse than panic adrenaline. Let\’s just say it\’ll leave a mark.
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Yes. I want to punch Robert Manufacturing Co. in the neck. They have it comin\’.
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Anyway, as it is Thanksgiving week, I will divert my attention back to being more thankful than I can possibly express to be back home. I simply cannot find the words. And I write for a living. Yes, my friends, it\’s just that good. There really is no place like home.
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— Follow Debra DeAngelo on Twitter. Links are posted at and http://www.edebra.com http://www.wintersexpress.com. Find Debra\’s columns online at http://www.wintersexpress.com, http://www.edebra.com and http://www.ipinion.me
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